I finally am beginning to understand something that God has been trying to teach me. So, two blogs in one day, but I'm posting it anyway. Partially to maybe teach others, and partially so I can sort through and organize my thoughts.
In a way, it reminds me of James 1:2, a verse I have read many, many times. The verse talks about being thankful for trials, for trials lead to perseverence, which leads to wisdom. I'm finally finding the heart knowledge to go along with the head knowledge.
I've had an interesting history, especially with my family. The main thing I'm talking about is my older brother (middle brother, that is). He's been in and out of juvi, jail, and prison since I was born. And I've finally quit letting it get to me, in a way. But for a long time, I wished there was someone who actually understood, who I could talk to and they could talk back and know what it's like to have family in prison and such.
Then last night some and even more during Sunday School this morning, I realized something. Maybe God gave me these situations so that I can be that someone for another person and use that experience to help someone else through a hard time.
And as I realized that, I learned what it mean to be thankful for your trials. Because I truly am. Don't get me wrong; if I could do it all again, I would not want these things to have happened, but since they did, I'm thankful, because God used them to change who I am, and I hope that he will use them so that I might be a tool, his tool, in reaching others for him, for his glory.
So now I'm finally starting to understand, and I'm praying that learning to be thankful for those struggles he's given me will lead me to perseverence and wisdom.
And I am so thankful for all he's done, even with the trials that come, because God gives me my strength, my every breath, and no matter what life throws at me, for "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
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